In my local rag, there's a touching story about a tortoise called Baby who went missing for week but has now been recovered. Her owner, Linda Hay, blames the adventure on the creature's hormones. "I think it was the time of the year that made her escape - I think she was on the look out for a male," she tells the Richmond Guardian.
Maybe I'm being a bit thick, but how exactly does a tortoise make an escape before you realise? It may be looking for a boyfriend, but it isn't likely to be speed dating.