WASHED AND READY TO EAT

Details of the UK's Diamond Jubilee celebrations are gradually seeping out . If you were expecting class, you'll be sorely disappointed. Think Klass instead. The Standard's Chief Arts Correspondent, Louise Jury, informs us that the family festival planned for the Jubilee will be hosted by former Hear'Say member Myleene. TV impressionist Jon Culshaw will be there to keep her company. What's more, we are promised 'an appearance by the equine stars of War Horse' and some show featuring the stars of Strictly Come Dancing , led by Craig Revel Horwood. It comes as no surprise to learn that the jamboree is sponsored by Sainsbury's. Do you think when George VI died he could have imagined the tawdry world which awaited his elder daughter some six decades on?

Pie in the sky: blarney on the packet had me fooled What could be tastier than a traditional Irish pie? To be sure, it's a treat that has been celebrated over countless generations from Adare to Youghal. So when I saw in Sainsbury's that it had been revived by a brand called 'Six Hungry Sons', I naturally licked my lips. Pieces of chicken in a rich gravy with a shortcrust pastry base and a puff pastry lid and no punctuation. This is nothing less than Michael's Chicken and Gravy Pie. I'm not sure who exactly Michael is, but I wonder if I'm looking at his picture in the aged sepia vignettes which have been lovingly dropped into the packaging? This is clearly a pie from the old school. As an enchanting story begins to unfold, I get the sense that Michael might not actually be one of the little lads pictured. He sounds more like a roving gastronomical expert, travelling to the corners of the earth to uncover age-old recipes and revive them for countless others t...