London estate agent Haart (tagline, 'Haart is where the home is') has taken to advertising its properties with a degree of panache. Eschewing the boring conventions of property postings, the company adds headlines to each listing. A maisonette in Crystal Palace is 'Perfect the Way It Is!', while you can just 'Plug in and Play' at the well-presented, £450k, two-bed flat in Merton Road SW18. 'Project in the Grid' sounds rather less inviting. Are the buyers supposed to have electrical engineering skills? Is south London actually part of the Matrix and we are on a mission to escape? The headline will, however, make perfect sense to those with intimate knowledge of Southfields. 'The Grid' is a network of upmarket local roads, which - in estate agent parlance - are much sought-after. The 'project' is doing the gaff up, as it's 'in need of modernisation'.
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