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Grunting, squeaking and squawking with the animals

You wait years to encounter a talking animal and then they arrive like buses.

No sooner had we heard about a whale called Noc, who seems to emulate human speech patterns, he was being challenged for his celebrity status by an elephant in Korea who likes nothing better than to chat away to his human visitors. No need for a Dr Doolittle to provide interpretation. The giant herbivore’s diction is so good that he’ll soon be able to place a trunk call all by himself.

It makes me think that Hitler wasn’t entirely barking up the wrong tree with his plans for a so-called ‘Woofen SS’ unit of dogs who could read, write and speak. Maybe the Nazi dictator just happened to pick the wrong species. The war could have ended so differently if talking whales had been linked by radio to U-boat commanders.

‘Achtung, Herr Korvettenkapitän! Ze British are poised to attack!’

‘You haf cracked zerr code?’

‘Nein. Wir haf just had a call from Villy ze Vale!’

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